The Culprit(s).

So, remember me talking (complaining) about this?



Some *thing* has been living in my back yard, burrowing some major tunnels under my birdfeeders. I've known that it's not a mole, because (a) there are no raised mounds over the tunnels, and (b) the entries to the tunnels are too small. The dogs have been hunting unsuccessfully for it (as I'm sure it's delightfully smelly to them), and we even TILLED the entire area last week in preparation for mulching & gardening - and still, NOTHING. No sign of the little bugger. Until yesterday.

Walking into my sunroom, I realized Jack was *super* enthusiastic about something in the yard. This is fairly common, as he's both a 7w8 and an avid bird (live toy) watcher... but this time he was REALLY into it. I walked over and saw this...




...not even six inches away from my glass door. Well, shit. I feel like I've been here before. Honestly, though, this thing must die. He's decimated my back yard to the point where, before we tilled the soil, you could take a step and sink easily 4-6 inches. He simply cannot stay. No vacancy, dude.


You hear that, Nature? NO VACANCY. This week has already thrust upon me:

Shelob (menacingly walking across my bathroom floor AS I WAS PEEING, no less. I don't even CARE if that's TMI. I will not suffer this incident silently. This was the biggest spider I've ever seen that wasn't in a display case. The thing could've had a collar.)


"Little she knew of or cared for towers, or rings, or anything devised by mind or hand,
who only desired death for all others, mind and body, and for herself a glut of life, alone,
swollen till the mountains could no longer hold her up and the darkness could not contain her."
Ticks* (including one IN. MY. BED.)

(*I don't take pictures of ticks. I remove them speedily and immediately execute them.
With a LIGHTER. Or a sharp knife. Or a sharp knife followed by a lighter. Frankly, I was going
to put an image of a tick from the web here, but I couldn't bear to look at the search
results for more than approximately 5 seconds. I'll spare you that, thankyouverymuch.)
Ants, though small in size, making up a long, rather massive marching line into Jack's bowl of kitten chow.



Dear Nature: I DONE HAD ENOUGH.